


Reflections

by 73stargazer



Category: Star Trek: The Next Generation
Genre: F/M, Friends to Lovers, Mirror Universe, Romance, Science Fiction
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-26
Updated: 2015-03-30
Packaged: 2018-03-19 19:33:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 6,046
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3621681
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/73stargazer/pseuds/73stargazer
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When Picard’s shuttle encounter an anomaly, he is transported to another universe, where he catches a glimpse into a life he has in another dimension.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Blinking the haze from his eyes, Picard fights heaviness to open his eyes. Staring up at a familiar face staring down at him in concern, Picard swallows in his dry throat.

“Take it easy,” instructs Beverly,” perching on the biobed next to his shoulder, rapidly scanning him with her tricorder whilst her eyes complete a quick visual scan. 

Bolting upright, Picard’s head pounds against his temples. “Beverly!”   
“Slow down!” commands Beverly, glaring at him warningly, urging him back down to a lying position on the bed. “Lay back.”

Grimacing, Picard lays his head against the pillow, glancing up at Beverly urgently. “What happened?”

“You didn’t heed Geordi’s advice,” admonishes Beverly, quirking a brow, setting aside her tricorder and shifting entirely onto the bed beside him. “He warned you about that energy anomaly and you insisted on piloting that damned shuttle. Your curiosity got in the way of your judgement, Jean-Luc.”

Appraising her curiously, Jean-Luc tries to set aside the pain pulsing through his head. “I miscalculated the trajectory and couldn’t get out of the path of the anomaly.”

Nodding, Beverly runs her hand along his arm. “We were close enough we could close in on you in time. We beamed you right to Sickbay. You've got a little concussion, but I’m not overly worried. You had a small fracture in your right hand but I’ve set it already. Other than that, just a few bumps and bruises.”

Glancing down at her hand running circles patterns along his arm, Picard’s eyebrows knit. “Right..uh…”

“You’re lucky, Jean-Luc,” Beverly tells hims jestingly. “You have to be more careful. Next time I may not be able to patch you up so easily. And, I couldn’t stand to see anything happen to you.”

Taken aback, Picard’s mouth falls agape, his mind reeling. Perhaps the concussion is slowing his mental processing, but he is having difficulty interpreting Beverly’s mannerisms. Trying to formulate an appropriate question, Jean-Luc struggles as Riker enters Sickbay, walking up to the biobed in the emergency ward.

“Hello, Captain. How are you feeling?” Riker inquires concernedly, taking stock of the captain’s physical condition. 

“Fine,” mutters Picard, his head foggy. 

“He’ll be fine,” Beverly assures Riker, patting Jean-Luc’s knee. “I’ll release him to go home. He just needs a good rest.”

Nodding, Riker returns his attention to the captain. “We’re clear of the anomaly, sir. We’ve nothing to be concerned of. We’re back on course now.” 

“Thank you, Number One,” nods Picard stiffly. 

“Have a good night, sir. I hope you feel better,” Riker replies warmly, a small smile on his lips. 

“Thank you, Will,” Beverly responds, watching as Will backs up, ducking out. 

“I can go home?” Picard asks hopefully, somewhat relieved. Truthfully, he is surprised that the doctor is willing to release him so quickly, but he is eager to get out of Sickbay. He just doesn’t feel right.

“Sure,” offers Beverly, rising off the of biobed. “There’s no reason for you to stay the night here. Just let me pack up here and we’ll get going. Stay still for a few moments and I’ll be back for you shortly.” 

Watching the doctor cross the room and converse with a nurse, Picard exhales slowly. To him, something is slightly off, but he cannot pinpoint what that something is.

 

***  PAGE BREAK

 

***

“Did Riker mention if they got any readings from the shuttle?” Picard inquires as Beverly leads them down the corridor. 

Nodding, Beverly rotates her neck slightly to address him as they head down the hall. “They did. You can look at them tomorrow. Remember, you’ve still got a bit of a concussion.You need to rest.”

Pursing his lips, Picard disagrees with her response, but he has no strength to fight with the doctor as she enters the passcode on the keypad to his cabin door. As she opens the door, Picard’s brows furrow, wondering to himself why Beverly has stopped at his cabin and is letting herself in. Sure, she is a frequent visitor in his quarters. In fact, most mornings she drops in for breakfast, and they will often have dinner together or simply chat. But, it’s certainly out of character for her to simply waltz right into his cabin. 

“Mom!” 

Eyes dilated, Picard follows Beverly through the door, where Beverly is immediately accosted by Wesley. 

Pausing, Beverly holds a hand up as Wesley rushes up to her urgently. “Slow down. What’s wrong?”

Bewildered, Picard shakes his head as the cabin door slides closed behind him.

“Maelle won’t go to sleep. I tried to get her to sleep, I did!” Wes explains breathlessly, his hands gesturing wildly. “She just kept stalling, asking for a glass of water, another bed time story, whining, crying.”

Rolling her eyes, Beverly pats Wesley’s shoulder. “It’s okay, honey. She’s just going through a phase. I’ll deal with it. Is Pierre in bed?”

Taking in a long breath, Wes nods. “Yeah. He was reading and when I checked he was asleep.”

“Thank you, sweetie,” smiles Beverly graciously. Turning to Picard, Beverly offers a weak smile. “I’m going to go get Maelle settled. Why don’t you go lie down?” 

Swallowing hard, Picard manages a lame bob of his head. He is so beyond confused at this point his head is spinning. 

“Go sit down. I won’t be long,” Beverly assures him, giving his hand a quick squeeze. 

Brows furrowing, Picard struggles to articulate any words as Beverly dashes across the room, apparently completely at ease in what he had thought was his cabin. Inhaling sharply, Picard attempts to steady his now rapidly beating heart. Perhaps he has more of a concussion than the doctor had detected. Perhaps he is missing something profound here.

“Papa? Are you okay?” inquires Wesley in concern, taking a step toward Picard. “Mom said you were hurt, but that you’d be fine. You don’t look fine.”

Mouth agape, Picard stares speechless at the teenager, thoroughly shocked that the boy had referred to him as ‘Papa’. What is going on here?


	2. Chapter 2

Part 2

“Papa? What’s wrong?” Peering at Picard in bemusement, Wesley takes a step closer to him, growing concerned. 

Giving his head a shake, Picard tries to plaster on a smile. “No…nothing. I’m fine. Sorry.”

 

“Can I get you something?” Wesley asks tentatively, wondering if his father is seriously maimed from the shuttle’s encounter with the strange, unexplored spatial anomaly. 

Lips pursed, Picard shakes his head. “No, thanks. I think…I think I’ll just sit down.”

Backing toward the living area, Picard attempts to take stock of his surroundings and circumstances. That is Beverly off in another room in the quarters. She looks almost identical to the Beverly he’s always known. This is Wesley Crusher, the same boy he’s proclaimed Acting Ensign on his ship, probably sixteen years-old and extremely precocious. Essentially, this is his cabin on the Enterprise, only slightly redesigned and larger. There are many more personal effects scattered across the room, with children’s toys beside the sofa and on the coffee table. As he approaches the sofa, he notices a large holophoto on the end table. Lowering himself onto the sofa, he peers closer at the holo to study the faces of the people in it. He recognizes the venue immediately, his family vineyard in LaBarre, France. In the picture, he, Beverly and Wesley are piled on the ground in the vineyard for a photo. However, there are two small children he doesn’t recognize in the photo. In Beverly’s lap sits a boy of maybe seven or eight years-old with wavy brown hair; in Jean-Luc’s lap lies a small girl, perhaps three or four years-old with long red hair weaved into a braid. All five of them look perfectly relaxed and content, apparently enjoying a vacation on Earth in Picard’s home town. Stifling a gasp, Picard knows instinctively somehow that this is his family. He and Beverly are married, and the children in this photo are his children. Gazing intently at the picture, Picard studies their features, looking for signs of his lineage in his offspring. He is startled out of his reverie when Wesley approaches the sofa, arm extended with a glass of water.

“Maybe you should lie down? I’ll go call Mom,” offers Wesley, handing Picard the glass of water. 

Accepting the proffered drink, Picard gives a small shake of his head. “That’s okay, thanks.”

Exhaling, Wes nods, but he is not convinced. He ducks away, leaving Picard in deep thought, appraising the photo thoroughly.

“I don’t understand,” whispers Picard to himself. “Where am I?” He absently takes a sip of the water and abandons the glass on the coffee table next to a small doll, which he assumes belongs to the little girl. “What happened on the shuttle?”

As Picard is still transfixed with the holophoto, Beverly enters the living area, visually assessing him as she walks up to the sofa. 

Sensing her presence, Picard rotates to face her, straightening. 

“What’s wrong?” Beverly inquires, looking at him concernedly, perching on the sofa next to him. “Wes said you were acting funny.”

Staring at her openly, Picard is at a loss for words. He doesn’t even know where to begin. How can he explain what he thinks and feels? How can he articulate that he knows that something is wrong with this….this universe? He knows she will think him crazy, and it will likely upset and hurt her. But somehow…somehow instinctively he knows this is wrong. He doesn’t….doesn’t belong….here.

“Jean-Luc?” Beverly’s eyes widen in concern, seeing Jean-Luc struggling internally. Grasping his hand, her other hand reaches for his shoulder. “What’s wrong, dear?”

Swallowing a lump in his throat, Jean-Luc can barely meet her eyes, so full of worry. “I don’t know. Perhaps it’s just the concussion.”

“You didn’t hit your head that bad,” Beverly points out, running her hand over his shoulder, growing acutely worried. “What’s got you so on edge?” 

Running his tongue over his dry lips, Jean-Luc briefly looks at their joined hands and notices the wedding bands on their ring fingers. A wave of strong emotion courses through him, forcing hot tears stinging the back of his eyes. The sight of his ring on Beverly’s hand is truly beautiful, but he knows it’s not real. They’re not married. She was married to his best friend. The best friend he was responsible for killing, albeit through an accident. Because of that, he had always kept his feelings for Beverly hidden. This isn’t his world. It can’t be.

“Jean-Luc, you’re starting to scare me,” confesses Beverly solemnly. 

Inhaling sharply, he squeezes her hand lightly. “I’m so sorry, Beverly. I think something has happened. This…this isn’t real.”

“What’s not real?” Beverly wonders, thoroughly bewildered. 

Staring into her clear blue eyes, Jean-Luc’s heart aches. “Us.”

“Us?” Repeats Beverly incredulously, entirely lost.

“I don’t know what happened,” admits Picard ruefully. “But, when my shuttle encountered that anomaly, something happened to bring me into this universe. This isn’t my life. We’re not…together. We’re not married. And, we don’t have any children.”

Speechless, Beverly’s jaw drops. It takes a long time for her to mentally register what Jean-Luc has professed, and she has to blink repeatedly, trying to focus on him and his words.

“I’m so sorry, Beverly,” murmurs Jean-Luc, squeezing her hand. “I’ve no idea what happened. I have to study that anomaly.”

Averting her eyes, Beverly bites her bottom lip, hot tears welling in her eyes. “I just….I don’t understand.”

“I know,” replies Picard calmly, running his hand up her arm. “I think somehow we have parallel universes and I’ve crossed from my universe into yours.” 

Giving her head a shake, Beverly tries in vain to ward off her tears. “So, you’re trying to tell me you’re not Jean-Luc?” 

“No, I am Jean-Luc. Just…not ‘your’ Jean-Luc,” explains Picard.

Eyes widening, Beverly absorbs this information hesitantly. “So, there’s another ‘me’ in your dimension?” 

“Well, I’d imagine there are infinite ‘yous’ in infinite dimensions. But, yes, there is a Beverly Crusher in my universe,” elaborates Picard, a tiny smile escaping his lip. 

Pursing her lips, Beverly briefly considers how much she would detest infinite versions of herself, returning instead to the point at hand. “Crusher? Jack is alive in your universe?”

“No,” admits Picard sadly. “He died in action in 2354 on the Stargazer.”

Taking in a long breath, Beverly nods. “He did here, too.”

“And then we were married?” Jean-Luc surmises, curious about his life in this Beverly’s world. 

Half-smiling, Beverly bobs her head. “We became close after Jack died. You helped me a lot after his passing. We were married quickly, and you didn’t want to waste any time having children. I had Pierre right away. We had two healthy, wonderful boys, but I always wanted a girl, so we had another baby, and along came Maelle.”

Jean-Luc cannot help but smile, thinking to himself how lucky his counterpart in this universe must be to have Beverly as a wife, with Wesley and two children of his own. “How old are they?”

“Pierre’s eight and Maelle is four,” Beverly tells him proudly, a broad smile on her face. 

“They sound wonderful,” remarks Jean-Luc, his voice catching in his throat.

“Yes,” whispers Beverly. “Actually….”Mid-sentence, Beverly pauses, suddenly remembering that she is not talking to her husband, but a variant of him from a whole other dimension.

“Actually, what?” presses Jean-Luc.

“Papa!” 

Whipping around, Jean-Luc’s attention is immediately diverted by the sudden appearance of a small red-headed girl in a pink nightgown barrelling toward the sofa. Face falling, Picard is caught off guard when the girl flings herself onto the sofa, directly into his lap.


	3. Chapter 3

Part 3

 

“Papa, I can’t sleep,” Maelle proclaims, wrapping her tiny arms around Jean-Luc’s chest. 

Shooting Picard a warning look, Beverly tries to wordlessly convey to him that she wants him to play along and not give Maelle any indication that anything is awry. However, Picard had had no intention of telling the child that he is, in fact, not actually her rightful father. 

Patting the child’s head awkwardly, Picard’s lips quirk, glancing helplessly to Beverly. 

“Come on, Maelle,” sighs Beverly in exasperation, reaching for her little arm. “Back to bed.”

“I want Papa to read me a story,” requests Maelle, burying her head of red locks into Picard’s chest. 

Rolling her eyes, Beverly crosses her arms across her chest. “Wes read you a story and I read you a story. You’re just stalling. It’s time to go to sleep. It’s long past bed time.” 

Pouting, Maelle looks up at Jean-Luc with big blue eyes, the same ones Picard had fallen for on Beverly nearly two decades ago. “Please, Papa!”

“Your mother says it’s time for bed,” Picard tells her, with as much conviction as he can muster. Truthfully, he isn’t sure what to do or what to say.

Letting out a disappointed sigh,Maelle sags into Jean-Luc’s chest. “Okay. Tuck me in, Papa?” 

Beverly smiles sadly, watching as Jean-Luc nods his acquiescence to the child’s plea as she scoops her arms around his neck, urging him to carry her. Observing him cautiously lifting her daughter’s tiny frame into his arm, it begins to dawn on her that this really isn’t her husband standing here before her. 

* *  
PAGE BREAK

 

* *

Lifting himself off of the edge of the bed, Jean-Luc draws the blankets up to a now slumbering Maelle’s chest, knowing that she would roll them down through the night and become cold. He had never had children and had never spent any significant amount of time with any children, but somehow, he feels connected to this little girl. He knows how to talk to her, to get her settled for bed. And, apparently, he knows to bring the covers up as high as possible because she’ll end up pushing them down throughout the night.

“Thank you,” whispers Beverly, putting a hand on his shoulder. “She doesn’t normally put up a fight. I think she just wanted Papa’s attention.”

Rotating to face her, Jean-Luc’s face is plagued in conflict. “I don’t know how…I’m not good with children, Beverly.”

Tilting her neck, Beverly half-smiles. “Of course you are.”

Shaking his head lightly, Jean-Luc takes her hand from his shoulder. “No. Your Jean-Luc may be. I am not.” 

Bowing her head, grief passes through Beverly’s eyes. “Right. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have had you put her to bed.”

“No, it’s alright,” Picard assures her, rubbing her hand between his. “Maelle is wonderful. I’m sure Pierre is, as well.” Choosing his words carefully, Picard grows earnest. “And if your Jean-Luc is the man I am, I’m sure he wants nothing more than to be reunited with you and your beautiful children.”

Swallowing hard, Beverly bobs her head. “How can we fix this?” 

“I have to find out what happened, study that anomaly,” relays Picard. “Perhaps there’s a way I can re-enter my universe, and return your Picard to your universe.”

“Riker and his team are working on interpreting the data,” Beverly replies.

“I’ll assist them, explain to them what’s happened,” decides Picard, straightening. 

“No,” interjects Beverly, putting a hand on his chest. “Jean-Luc, you’re not working. You’re injured. You’re going through a lot right now. You need to rest.” 

“I need to return to my own universe,” retorts Jean-Luc firmly. 

“Tomorrow,” counters Beverly, putting her other hand on his arm. “You can work on it in the morning. They’ll know more by then. Tonight, you need to rest.” 

Somehow, he also knows that, like with his Beverly, he should avoid arguing over his health with her. “Very well.”

Guiding him out of the girl’s bedroom, Beverly is in full doctor-mode. “I want you to lie down. I’m going to get you a hypo.” 

“Beverly, where am I going to sleep?” Picard inquires suddenly, pausing as they reach the living area. 

Turning around to face him, Beverly stares at him, puzzled. “In our bed.”

Raising a brow, Picard cannot help but smirk. “As much as I would love to…”

Rolling her eyes, a tiny smile escapes the corner of her mouth. “Jean-Luc, don’t be silly. You’re sleeping with me. Our children are accustomed to us sharing a bed. I don’t want them to think anything is wrong.”

Shrugging, Jean-Luc grins. “Very well. You should know that I snore.”

Laughing lightly, Beverly steps forward, bracing her hands on his forearms. “My, dear, I know very well. We’ve been married for a decade. But, I think it’s only fair to warn you that I steal the blankets.”

Laughing along with her, Jean-Luc resists the sudden urge to close the distance between their lips and kiss her mouth. 

Watching his face fall, Beverly grips his arm. “What’s wrong, Jean-Luc?”

“I know,” murmurs Jean-Luc, his gaze wandering from her lips to her concerned eyes.

“You know what?” Beverly asks, confused. 

“I know you hog the bed sheets,” elaborates Jean-Luc, bringing his hand up to her arm. “I know that. I knew that. Somehow.”

Stealing his gaze, Beverly’s heart pounds against her chest, her head throbbing. “Jean-Luc…”

Lowering his gaze, Jean-Luc exhales audibly. “I think I should lie down.”

Resting her forehead against his, Beverly squeezes his arm affectionately. “Go get settled. I’ll make you a cup of tea and get my med kit.”

“Thank you,” replies Picard hoarsely. “You’re amazing in both universes.”

Half-smiling, Beverly brushes her lips over his cheek. “”As are you.”

* *  
PAGE BREAK

***

“Jean-Luc?” Tilting onto her side, Beverly shifts to face Jean-Luc,lying flat on his back beside her in bed. She knows he is still awake by the sound of his breathing, but she asks softly just in case. 

“Yes?”Jean-Luc rotates his neck to look at Beverly in the shadows of the room, the only light from the viewport above the bed. He had always longed for this kind of intimacy with Beverly, but tonight he is entirely distracted by her presence, knowing that he is powerless to take any action. He’s distracted by the way the starlight from the viewport illuminates in her eyes, the smell of her hair, the sounds of her soft breathing. He’s finding it extremely difficult to turn off his brain and go to sleep when the woman he had longed for for so long is next to him. However, he reminds himself that she is not that woman. This woman belongs to a much smarter version of himself who had not been so foolish as to let his own guilt and fear control his life for so long. That version of himself had lived for a decade with Beverly and enjoyed, what to Picard appeared to be, a beautiful family. 

“Tell me about ‘your’ Beverly. What am I like in your universe?”Beverly tucks a hand beneath her head, staring openly at Jean-Luc. 

Smiling warmly, Jean-Luc turns to face Beverly, their faces a mere inch apart. “Well, I suppose you’re essentially the same. It seems that where the universes diverge is after Jack’s death.”

Nodding, Beverly studies his expressions carefully. “So, we’re not together? I’m on the Enterprise, and I’m a single mother raising Wesley on my own?”

Bobbing his head, Picard watches pain etch through her eyes. “Yes. You’re doing a marvellous job. He’s a good kid.”

Pursing her lips, Beverly appears troubled. “That doesn’t sound easy, though. I’m sure it’s lonely.” Beverly can hardly fathom the life that this Jean-Luc is describing. Her, single, only Wesley. No Jean-Luc. No Pierre. No Maelle. To her, it seems like an incomplete puzzle, with half of the pieces missing. 

“Yes. I imagine so,” agrees Jean-Luc. He hadn’t really considered that his Beverly might be terribly lonely and struggling to raise her teenager on her own. Beverly had always been strong and independent. However, seeing this Beverly, hearing her point this out to him, makes him consider his own Beverly’s viewpoint. 

“Jean-Luc,” murmurs Beverly softly, reaching for his hand. “We…I am having another baby.”

Eyes dilating, Jean-Luc takes her hand. “Baby?” 

“I’m twelve weeks along,” Beverly elaborates, resting her forehead against his. “We…I didn’t plan this one. It was actually a delightful surprise. Well, you…my Jean-Luc was thrilled when we found out.”

Swallowing hard, Jean-Luc glances down in the direction of her midsection, the blankets rolled up over them. “Baby….”

Placing her hand on his shoulder, Beverly lets out a long breath. “I know you may not like children, but we were ecstatic.” 

Jean-Luc drops his hand, moving it under the blankets to rest on her still flat stomach. Closing his eyes, he brushes his lips against hers. “No. This is my child. I will love it.”

Grimacing, warm tears pool in Beverly’s eyes. “Jean-Luc…”

Sighing deeply, Jean-Luc pecks her lips, his hand caressing her stomach. “I will make this right, Beverly. I promise.”


	4. Chapter 4

Part 4 

 

“Shsh!Quiet. You’ll wake up Papa,” admonishes Beverly, pulling her four year-old daughter into her lap. 

Roused out of his slumber by the soft giggling of a youngster and the muffled response of the woman beside him, Jean-Luc open his eyes rapidly.

“Mama, can Papa take me to pet the horsies in the holly-deck today?” Maelle asks hopefully, reaching up to play with Beverly’s tangled mane of red hair. 

Picard watches as the little girl curls into Beverly’s chest, her fingers twirling a lock of Beverly’s hair. 

“Oh, I don’t know, darling, “ answers Beverly softly, dropping a kiss to the girl’s crown. “I think he may be working late tonight. We’ll have to see. Come on, let’s go before we wake Papa. ”

“That’s alright,” interjects Jean-Luc groggily, lazily righting himself to a sitting position in the bed.

Frowning, Beverly regards him apologetically. “I’m sorry.”

Smiling assuringly at Beverly, Jean-Luc then looks at Maelle, his smile broadening. “You want to see the horses?”

“Can we, Papa?” Maelle asks excitedly. 

“Perhaps later, or tomorrow,” Jean-Luc responds with reservation, putting a hand on her head of red hair. “Unfortunately, I’m quite busy today.” 

Frowning in disappointment, Maelle nods.

Jean-Luc turns his head at the sound of footfalls at the open door to the bedroom, where he discovers a a young boy bouncing into the room. Smiling again, he instantly recognizes the boy as his son. 

Pierre dashes across the room, jumping onto the end of the bed.

Rolling her eyes with a hidden smile, Beverly stifles a laugh. “Morning, sweetie.”

“Hi,” Pierre replies breathlessly, climbing over to Jean-Luc. “Papa, can I bring the rocks you collected from the dig on the lunar colony at Ranos in to show my class today?”

Taken aback, Picard is puzzled as the eight year-old climbs onto his lap over the blankets. “I’m sorry?”

Tilting his head, Pierre looks at Picard expectantly. “You said I could bring the rocks in to show my class. Can I take them to class today?” 

Recovering quickly, Picard nods, trying not to give any indication that he had no idea what the child was referring to in regards to this conversation. “Yes, yes, of course.” 

Beverly smiles at the boy. “Alright, guys. No time to waste. Go get washed up. I’ll be out in a minute and get you some breakfast.” 

Grinning, Pierre climbs out of Picard’s lap and jumps off of the bed. “I’m gonna pack up the rocks. I can’t wait to show everyone!” 

Watching the boy skip out of the room, Picard’s smile fades. He cannot believe how similar the child is to him. He is in awe of his wonder and enthusiasm. He hardly notices as Maelle climbs off of the bed and crosses the room, he’s so deep in his reverie.

“I’m sorry we woke you,” Beverly says apologetically, putting her hand on Picard’s shoulder once the door closes behind Maelle. 

Startled out of his pensive reflection, Picard turns to face her.

“What’s wrong?” inquires Beverly, appraising the deep set lines etching his face. 

He cannot describe the feelings, and, honestly, he’s ashamed to admit it to her. Right now, he’s never wanted anything more. Admittedly, he had imagined what a life with Beverly might look like. However, his fantasies could not compete with this reality. Falling asleep with her by his side. Being awoken by the sounds of his children jumping on their bed. Staring into her eyes now, so unguarded and trusting. It physically pains him. For half of a second, he considers what would happen if he didn’t explore the option of returning to his rightful dimension. 

Gripping his arm with her other hand, Beverly stares into his eyes with undisguised worry. “Jean-Luc?”

Smiling ruefully, Jean-Luc brings a hand up to cup her cheek, his thumb caressing her neck. “I’m sorry, Beverly. I just…I was just thinking that I don’t want to leave this world.”

 

Biting her lip, tears begin to sting the backs of Beverly’s eyes as she holds his gaze. “Jean-Luc….”

“I’m sorry,” apologizes Jean-Luc regretfully. “I very much like what I…what your Picard has here.” 

Tears cascading down her cheeks, Beverly squeezes his shoulder, simply torn. “So do I. I want him back. I’m so…I’m so sorry.” 

Resting his forehead against hers, Jean-Luc sighs deeply. “Me, too.”

Closing her eyes, Beverly lets the tears trail down her cheeks, her heart aching at the pain this man is experiencing. She considers her Mirror in the other universe, and how lonely she might be, how empty she might feel. She simply does not understand how her counterpart could not be with Jean-Luc. And, in this moment, it takes all of her strength to resist embracing him, comforting him and assuring him. She has to remind herself that it’s not actually her Jean-Luc.

Tracing his thumb across her cheek, he absorbs the wake of her tear tracks. “I’m going to go talk to Riker and Data. We need to study this anomaly. I’m going to find a way to return your husband.”

Tilting her head, Beverly presses her lips to his cheek. “Thank you, Jean-Luc.”

 

***

PAGE BREAK 

***   
“Your course is laid in, sir. We will be in constant communication,” Data relays, standing next to a shuttle pod in the cargo bay beside Riker and Picard, with Beverly standing on the other side of Picard waiting for Picard to board the shuttle. 

“Thank you, Data,” nods Picard, tugging on the tunic of his uniform.

“Sir, when you encounter the anomaly, you’ll experience the same energy drain,” Riker reminds Picard. “Your pod will lose power and you’ll suffer damage. But, if all goes according to plan, it will reverse the parallel course and return you to your universe and send your counterpart back to our universe.”

“The parallel course occurred at the moment of the energy drain, so from that point forward the dimensions should be corrected,” Data elaborates. 

 

Bobbing his head, Picard turns to Riker. “I believe we’re all set. Would you mind giving us a moment? You can return to the Bridge and I’ll give you the signal when I’m ready to launch.”

Glancing between Picard and Beverly, Riker nods his understanding. “Yes, sir. We’re ready when you are.”

Data follows Riker through the cargo bay, and the two exit quietly as Beverly turns to Picard anxiously.

“You really think this is going to work?” Beverly asks him honestly, briefly glancing to the shuttle pod.

Taking her hands, Picard smiles confidently. “I do. I’m going to set this right.”

Closing the gap between them, Beverly squeezes his hands affectionately. “Promise me something?”

Bobbing his head, Jean-Luc rubs her hands in his. “Yes.”

“If you get back to your own dimension, don’t let whatever fears or reservations you may have hold you back. Go to your Beverly, and tell her how you feel. She needs to know.” Bringing her hand up, Beverly lays her hand against his cheek, smiling warmly. “I know that the two of you are not us, but I imagine you still deeply care for each other. I’m certain she feels for you the same way I feel for my Jean-Luc. Take a chance. I’m sure you could be wonderful together.”

Pressing his lips to her gently, Jean-Luc is filled with renewed hope and purpose. “I know we could. Gratefully, I’ve gotten a very lovely reflection of what we could be. That you, Beverly.”

Smiling wistfully, Beverly drops his hand. “Goodbye, Jean-Luc. And, good luck.”

Backing toward the shuttle, Picard inhales sharply. Perhaps this little foray into a different dimension could end up having a positive effect for him in his own world. If he ever makes it back home.


	5. Chapter 5

Part 5

“Jean-Luc?” Beverly gazes down at the hazel eyes blinking up at her from the biobed, a flood of relief passing through her at the look of relieved recognition on his face.

“Beverly!”Jean-Luc bolts upright in the bed, reaching for her. 

Grinning, Beverly grasps his arms to slow him. “Take it easy.”

Enveloping his arms around her, Jean-Luc captures her lips in a desperate kiss, practically pulling her onto the bed. 

Beaming, Beverly slips one leg onto the bed, cradling the side of his face. “It’s okay.”

Pulling her onto the bed beside him, Jean-Luc is breathless. “I was in a whole other dimension. And…and we weren’t married, and we didn’t have any children, and..”

“I know,” interjects Beverly, stroking his cheek. “Calm down. You’ve still hit your head, and I’ve just set that fractured hand.”

“It was like…the past decade hadn’t happened,” explains Picard,trailing his hand down her arm. His eyes wander down to her stomach. “Our life together. The children. This baby…”

Resting her forehead against his, Beverly pecks his lips. “I know. It’s okay. Everything’s okay now.”

Jean-Luc lays his hand against the flat plane of her stomach, taking in a long breath as he absorbs the heat radiating from her. “It was awful. I couldn’t hold you, touch you, be with you.”

Smiling against his lips, Beverly can empathize completely. “I know.”

Looking into her clear eyes, Jean-Luc smirks. “Did he make a pass at you?”

Laughing lightly, Beverly feels herself start to relax. “Well, you are incredibly difficult for me to resist.” 

Eyes widening, Jean-Luc’s lips curl devilishly. “I hope you did, Mrs. Picard.”

Peppering kisses to his lips, Beverly caresses his neck. “He was good, but he wasn’t you.”

Satisfied, Jean-Luc returns her kisses, burying a hand in her hair. 

Drawing back, Beverly grows serious. “I hope our counterparts make out okay.”

“I have a feeling they’ll be just fine,” surmises Jean-Luc confidently. 

 

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“Jean-Luc?” Beverly gazes down at the hazel eyes blinking up at her from the biobed, a flood of relief passing through her at the look of relieved recognition on his face.

“Beverly!”Jean-Luc bolts upright in the bed, reaching for her. 

Grinning, Beverly grasps his arms to slow him. “Take it easy.”

Picard had not intended to react so strongly to seeing Beverly in Sickbay, peering down at him with blue eyes of concern. He had assumed he would relay to her what he had encountered in the other universe and have a discussion with her like rational adults. Now that he is here, however, he leaps on the opportunity to do what he could not do in the other dimension, what he had longed to, but was out of his reach. In the moment, he takes her arm and draws her to him, his other hand cupping her face. He captures her lips in a long, slow kiss, one full of the yearning of years of repressed desire.

Moaning lowly, Beverly sinks onto the bed beside him, melting into his arms as she returns his kiss, oblivious to the sights and sounds around them.

Finally drawing back, Jean-Luc drinks her in with his eyes, panting for air. “I was….”

“I know,” cries Beverly, balancing herself against his chest. 

“They…She…”stutters Jean-Luc, trying to formulate the words to convey his feelings.

“I know,” Beverly assures him, running her hand along his chest. “I can imagine.”

“We’ve been fools, Beverly,” cries Jean-Luc, cradling the side of her face. “A decade. A whole life they’ve lived together. Two children…”Glancing down at her midsection, Picard clears his throat. “Another baby on the way. It’s…it’s remarkable. We’ve wasted so much time.”

Groaning, Beverly casts her gaze downward, trying to compose herself. “Jean-Luc…We’re not them.”

“I know,” Jean-Luc murmurs into her hair, trying to wrap his head around everything. He’s exhausted and slightly light-headed, but he doesn’t know if it’s from the concussion or the emotional experience. 

“That’s their world, not ours,” Beverly states pointedly, drawing back. “We can’t make up lost time, and we can’t have their life.”

“Yes, I realize that,” Picard replies, loosening his hold marginally. 

“I know you met their children, got close to the Beverly in that universe. But, she’s not me. Those aren’t our children. That’s their world. That’s her life. And, frankly, I don’t want her life. I want mine. I love my job and my friends, and I’ve taken pride in raising Wesley.” Beverly doesn’t know how to convey to him that the path they had chosen after Jack’s death had greatly impacted the woman she had developed into over the past decade. While he may have been attracted to her Mirror in the other dimension, they are not entirely perfect reflections. 

Taking her hands in his, Jean-Luc smiles warmly. “I don’t want their life, either. I want you, just the way you are now. I don’t want to go back in time and have a do-over. I…I guess it was just shocking to see what might have been. I do somewhat regret that I didn’t speak up sooner.”

“Yes,” concedes Beverly with an easy smile.

“Well, Beverly Crusher,” grins Jean-Luc, lacing their fingers. “Last time your counterpart escorted me to my quarters to monitor my recovery. Would you care to do the same?”

Laughing lightly, Beverly nods as Riker enters Sickbay through the main doors. “That sounds prudent. I’d rather be overly-cautious in my attention to the captain.”

Approaching, Riker smiles at the scene of the captain and doctor laughing good-naturedly. “Hi, Captain. I take it the plan worked?” 

Diverting his attention to Riker, Picard puts on a professional face. “Yes, Number One. Everything’s fine.” Glancing to Beverly, he cannot prevent his smile from reforming in the corner of his lips. “Everything is just fine.”


End file.
